Mitch Wagner's Other Blog
Avoiding direct sunlight in San Diego.
I ain't afraid of no spammers:
mitch@mitchwagner.com
I’m getting spam about how you can lose weight with coffee.
Here’s how it works — and I won’t even charge you.
Get a 50-pound bag of coffee beans. Doesn’t matter where they were grown. Doesn’t matter if they’re green or roasted.
Carry the 50-pound bag up and down a few flights of stairs.
You’re welcome!
I hate it when that happens.
I regard romantic comedies as a subgenre of sci-fi, in which the world operates according to different rules than my regular human world. For me, there is no difference between Ripley from “Alien” and any Katherine Heigl character. They are equally implausible.
Romantic SMS. Sent by a friend.
- REDACTED: hey! it's been a long time
- Mitch Wagner: Who are you? You're showing up in my IM as <redacted>. Do I know you?
- REDACTED: hello have we chatted before?
- Mitch Wagner: You IMed me. Who are you and what can I do for you?
- REDACTED: duhhr i msged u on the site right, sorry.
- Mitch Wagner: I'm sorry if I should know who you are — IM isn't showing me your real name or a nym that I recognize. What site are you referring to?
- REDACTED: I'm Sophia, I'm 23 year old, and i love to meet new people
- Mitch Wagner: Ah. I'm 50 and I love to block porn spammers.
Jerky husbands berate their wives about bad coffee.
Possible responses (paraphrased from the comments on the original post on Boing Boing):
“How about a nice tasty cup of shut the fuck up.”
“I’m sorry, dear. The poison was supposed to be tasteless.”
“I Ride With the Outboard Ravagers”
“This is the kind of competitive sport I can get behind.”
So, you’re mad about something on the Internet
Via desertwolf
One of these is a horror-comedy about bloodsucking vampires.
The other one is on HBO.
